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I'm in the Red River Gorge, the climbing is off the hook
TIME: 02:46PM Thursday December 01,2011
FROM:five ten   

 

    What it's like when it rains, why its awesome when there is sun, and why I try to make electronic music these days.

 

   I have been in the Red River Gorge for nearly 15 days now, and although I am brimming with syke every time its sunny outside and we get to go rock climbing, I start royally freaking out when the rain and snow roll in and shut down the whole entire climbing operation. I have climbed for two four-day blocks so far, in between storms, which roll through ever so slowly and drench the cliffs with cursed agua, and one extra day in the rain. I have been lucky I had the chance to try the hard routes I traveled here to climb, at least once or twice each. Pure Imagination, The Golden Ticket, 24 Karat, Southern Smoke, Lucifer, and the Vadar Project are all majestic, and they may be some of the few routes in the world which suit me to the tee. Since the hard routes are all quite fingery, and skin is a major issue here, I have been doing tons of classics in an attempt to rediscover my route climbing rhythm, and gain the necessary resistencia which is needed to excel in an area like this. I will admit, as this is my second trip to this place, I am blown away by the quality of the rock, the natural nature of the way the routes flow. The fact that I have never dedicated some time to climbing here confuses me, and makes me question whether I even know what the hell I am doing after climbing for 15 years.

 

   Why on earth don't I live here?

 

   I wonder this nearly every day, for a couple solid minutes, until I hit the next step in the thinking process. How would that work?

 

   Buy a little house maybe? One that is all crunk and dilapidated that could be fixed up - it could be sick, I would learn how to build, and I would get walkie talkies like Lev! Or even better, I could buy a crag, build some fortress into the middle of it, with sticks and ropes or something, and live like a crazy person in some weird cave! You could even start a Bourbon distillery and get involved in something totally different, or run for some local political position just for the hell of it, and try and makes some changes. If you got bored, Lexington has a Whole Foods AND a mall, which has a Hot Tpoic inside, THE destination for non-conformist freak-attacks impervious to the world we live in in 2011. All these options are plenty good enough for some gypsy rock climber like myself… It would be even be that chance to buy a huge arsenal of guns in preparation for 2012, learn how to kill deer and cook them, and protect myself from the psychos, and bears (which people constantly talk about like they are grizzlies, and like they are more dangerous then the psychos).

 

   I could do three months a year for sure, in the fall most likely.  I would have my land, I could get some dogs and cats that would just roam around, mostly in the street, like our neighbors do, and delve into bolting crazy cirques, full of random futuristic masterpieces! This place is full of new rock, and some of it has the potential for some really spectacular routes.

 

   Well, after five minutes of thinking fast in this manner, I  start to remember some things, things which you only think about when they happen, but somehow seem to pertain and deter every time they are brought up.

 

   I rains here, a lot sometimes, and then it can snow, or a freak temperature change could rock your world and get the cliffs totally soaked from condensation, joker! If you want to go look for new rock, you must be fully prepared for the possibility of getting shot by some local "farmers" which totally sux, and is super dicey ( I have a fear of getting shot). On that note it seems important to have some crazy ass roll dawgs - people who carry guns, people who know how to use them,  people like Joe Haynes more or less, and to get used to packin heat yourself, which seems normal to some people, but to people like me seems loc'd out!

 

   So maybe I don't feel guilty for not living here, or not buying property cuz its all cheap, but this place is seriously good enough to make you got through the whole thought process, and actual;y eight out options like the ones I mentioned!

 

   I guess I must info you all one thing however.

 

   I want to move nearly every place I go!

 

   I was just in China, and on a "walk-about" to visit a cave which houses 70 people, complete with school and bamboo-casacitas, we discovered yet another arch, packed with futuristic lines of 120 meters a piece, and just looking all bad-ass in general. There is plenty of room to build an entire village underneath the arch, amongst all these boulders, and its only a 45 minute walk from nearest paved roads to the spot, it could be amazing to build your own little world, and try and dodge the chinese authorities who fer shur would try and kick you out for overstaying your visa, and bringing Facebook to rural spots like Getu Ha.

 

   I think i get carried away, I guess thats the deal, but whats a homeless person supposed to do? i need to find a place to settle down, and everywhere has its draw at first, its just when you got get a;; nit picky about it and wonder if you will survive life there in the first p;lace which always sways the decisions and gets you back where you started, on your way to the next destination.

 

   So yeah, hopefully I can get a shot at doing some of these routes, without having to move here, start a life, get a gun, and get a dog. I am particularly enchanted by these hard rigs here. Every route has a nice balance between movement and aesthetics. The lines are all attractive AND they have perfect holds, and perfect moves. Everything is all natural as well, which is simply amazing if you ask me; these days its hard to find a place thats not 5,000 miles away that isn't all chipped up with and glued up all crazy-style.  If it doesn't work out this time around, I will be forced to return. I can stay for another 15 days, which would be totally awesome, but if it all starts to fizzle, and these double and triple rest days become a trend, then it will be time to chalk it up as a total bummer and   go with plan B;  flee this joint and buy a one way flight back to DIA, in Colorado, where amy car lives, then drive that thing straight down to Hueco for some good ol sunny weather and bouldering.

 

   In the meantime, I am going to keep chopping wood and trying to get that fire stoked, as well as make some more electronic music (which I have getting all syked on producing) and try and cross the passionate over to something productive, in lieu of gettin' CRAZY!

 

   OH YEAH, and since I haven't gotten any photos of myself climbing, I am adding just a couple random pics from the last days, and if any one wants to see more current randomness, I have been recentally turned on to INSTAGRAM, so if you are into photos, hit me up there, my name is

 

dave_graham_

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